[ he's well-aware she's looking at her leg, maybe referring to the loss of her other one as being the price for trying to attain glory. raven may think herself to be a little character in the mythology of the ark people, but where clarke is often the one to challenge him, raven had steered him and given him a path to run along when he had needed it most. ]
[ there's glory to be found in being the little guy. it may not get someone a golden apple at the end of the day, but there's something. ]
Remind me to tell you the story of Psyche. Little fish in a sea of sharks, but I think she got the happiest story of them all.
[Like she said it once, there's nothing great in being a king or a princess. But if there's nothing great in being a pawn, either, which part is left that could satisfy? She squeezes her eyes shut, then looks up at him.]
[ and bellamy is more than happy to tell her the story, and then another, and then even another. but she's allowed to joke, and so he thinks it's his turn to be a pain in the ass. ]
[ he looks at her when she closes her eyes, then down at her leg when she opens them. ] I would, but ... [ he presses his lips together and shrugs, wanting to convey it's not really his fault he can't. he doesn't realise he lifts one of his hands to wrap his fingers gently around her ankle. ] I only tell stories in exchange for food.
[ free coffee and its delivery get him here with the exchange of company, but his stories don't come without their price. he's found she's paid for them in lasagne and tacos. ]
[ though he doesn't expect any food now, not when she's comfortable, it's a promise he doesn't want to acknowledge. there's only one coffee boy who's been to her place, after all. he figures he may as well make it worth it. ]
[Oh, well. She realizes just fine for the two of them, and huh. That's -- that's apparently a thing. A thing that she likes.
She raises her eyebrows. (At him, and at herself liking the thing.)] So you have a price. Ah. [The next time he calls her a pain in the ass, she's going to throw a ditto at him.
She's not focusing on his hand around her ankle, she's not.] Too bad I don't have your currency on me.
[ at first, he taps his fingers lightly against her ankle. ]
I'm not cheap. [ he frowns, but smiles as he says it, like he's amused by her or he's having fun cornering her a little. ] You did just tell me to do what I wanted. [ she doesn't need the reminder, but maybe she does. mom used to tell him he could be anything he wanted to be, but he'd always seen the limitations due to his station. what raven's said — it's not something he's just going to brush aside. ]
[ only a part of him is aware he's stopped tapping his fingers against her ankle. he becomes aware of what he's doing after a few moments, but he doesn't stop his fingers from pressing into it, as if digging for the bone so he can touch her marrow, too. he knows he's purposefully kneading it, but he thinks he has a good excuse. ]
[ this had been the leg they'd drilled into. he hadn't had the chance to check in on her before coming here. it's not really a good excuse at all, but bellamy's so tired of his people getting hurt and he has to pass them over to abby to take care of and maybe even lecture. ]
[ but he acts like he's not even aware of what he's doing, like he doesn't wonder if her ankle hurts from the strain of her own stubborn determination to not act like she's falling apart. to him, she's not. there may be no glory in a bum leg, but there's strength to be found. ] I can't make coffee, but I can tell stories.
[And give footrubs, unintentionally, apparently. All this, without giving him food first, so she assumes he might do it because he wants to. Maybe; she hasn't felt the shift that should come with the realization of what he's doing, not yet.
The kneading, though, it makes something lock in her chest and she thinks that feels better than any hug or kiss or fuck she's had since she's been here. Which is unfair, to a number of people.
Maybe she should invest in one of these every week. Someone to knead life back into her limbs, so they don't hurt. She stays on her feet so often because getting up after sitting down always happens with a flinch, but there's a price to so much stubbornness.]
I've heard. You might be able to make some money out of that if you wanted. [She shrugs.] They let me dismantle cars even though I haven't touched one before in my life, so you know -- get creative.
[ he assumes it is. anything raven puts her mind to usually benefits the wider community, just like bellamy's decisions benefit the individual. ]
[ — like moving his hand down to the arch of her foot, kneading along the way. it's purposeful now, his other hand joining to dig his thumb into the arch of her foot. ]
[ he figures she's too stubborn and stupid to think about the fact she's placing so much weight on the one leg. mom had both hers but the weight of octavia to carry once. he thinks maybe she's strained herself like aurora had, too proud to ask for help, too much of a lone wolf to want to bother anyone. ]
[ he continues to act like he's not aware of what he's doing, even when his gaze slips to her foot as he shifts it so her heel digs into his thigh. looking up at her with a crease to his brows, it's clear he doesn't think his storytelling can be much use. ] They've got all these bookstores to go along with the twenty coffee shops they've got built next to one another. I doubt I could seriously make money off that.
[So, not unintentional. She feels the shift to purposeful, even if he doesn't acknowledge it, and apparently they're back to touching each other comfortably. Or, he's touching her at least, and taking some of her pain away in the process.
Isn't this familiar.
She actually shudders when he kneads the arch of her foot, not putting it in words that it felt good.
She frowns, and focuses on his words instead; what, like stories can't be useful? Maybe if psychoes like Murphy had grown up with more stories, they wouldn't turn up the way they did. Raven, she fixes things and finds solutions; he only had to plant the seed in her head and she came up with walkie talkies. He's planted the seed, she comes up with,]
So do that. Fuck- [That knot of tension, fuck. She squeezes her eyes shut and shakes her head and then focuses again. With an exhale through her nose, she looks at him again.] People come here from times more ancient than the twenty first century, some of them probably don't even know how to handle books. I've seen so many repetitive network posts asking for a story. Tell stories.
[ bellamy watches her. he doesn't say anything, feeling as though he doesn't need to address what's happening at all. he already knows his motivation, even if it's a little messy and blurred and he can't quite pick whether it's concern or his hands needing to stay busy. he may not be the tinkerer like raven, but he's not someone who can sit still while staring at the paint of her apartment for a good hour. ]
[ he doesn't feel like saying anything about her reaction, even though it just tells him what he suspected: idiot. his hands continue to knead at her foot, wondering just how knotted she's allowed her good leg to become. he doubts it'll help her walk any easier, but it's something. ]
[ he can't just sit around and do nothing. ]
Tell stories. [ he repeats it, sounding incredulous. nothing is that simple. not in their world — but he's been reminded again and again, by the people here, by the things here, by how even those from home react to here, that this isn't their home at all. he shakes his head, looking down at her ankle. ] Alright. It sounds too damn easy, but — [ it's something. something he can be useful in, as he feels himself being useless, with no place at all, in eudio. ]
[ he chooses to joke, instead of confessing that. ] It's kind of sad people don't know how to hold a book. It's easier than a rifle.
[Tell stories and rub feet, she thinks, but doesn't say so because she's not acknowledging it, right? Right. There's a knot in her stomach now that's all nerves and tension, and it takes him actually digging in to the tension in her foot to undo it.
She lets out a pained little garbled laugh, because of where he just touched, and lets her head drop back against the arm rest.]
[ his fingers slow at her laugh before he lets them dig into her foot once more. if she doesn't like it, he thinks she'd pull it away, yell at him or maybe kick him. but he's keen to not inflict any more pain on her; bellamy thinks she's suffered enough. ]
[ he lets his eyes drift to her foot before looking up at her, noting how she rests her head against the arm rest. he sits comfortably, back against the cushions, no longer slouching so relaxedly he may slip off. ]
Guess what matters is we know how to hold a book. [ he tries not to smile as he quips, ] I don't know if you can read one, though.
[She actually pulls her foot out of his grip to kick his stomach, lightly.] Go float yourself. [And then sets it back into his hands, not a second later, so he could, you know, continue.
[ he laughs out, ] Hey! [ leaning backward, unable to escape her kick. his hands drop from her foot before she settles it back on his lap. if she didn't like it, he figures she'd shift her leg to the floor, or even fold it underneath herself to keep it away from his clutches. if anything, he knows she'd opt to embarrass him instead by telling him not to touch her. ]
[ looking at her pointedly, he rolls his eyes before he returns to his self-imposed task. he doesn't know if this will help her at the end of the day, but a brace can only do so much to alleviate the tension. he speaks to her matter-of-factly, ] That still doesn't prove you know how to.
[She laughs out,] Fuck you. [She still feels tingles up her leg from where he's touching her, but it doesn't matter none when her pride is hurt. She's a genius, mr. nerdy janitor.]
Gimme your stupid book, I'm going to read you a story and then hit you with it.
[ bellamy laughs, shaking his head. ] Nuh uh. I'm not falling for that. [ if he's to get up and grab the book he'd bought, the very one that sits next to his takeaway cup of coffee he's since forgotten, he can easily predict what will happen. swap her own proposal around and there it is. ]
[ besides, he doesn't wish to move. he's comfortable, sitting on her couch, doing something for her that neither of them really acknowledge within the moment. maybe it doesn't need to be, at least not within this minute where he has her completely distracted. he doesn't stop touching her, though, fingers moving down the length of her foot as slowly as a snail. ] You'd read the title and throw it at me. [ and he tsks in a reprimand of her predictability. ] Any excuse to hit me.
[Maybe, just maybe, she doesn't want him to move either so this is fine. But she's still rattled and amused in equal parts.]
Yes, because you're begging for it right now. [She crosses her arms under her head, convinced she's thinking the right thing.] I've studied from books thicker than that one.
And those books helped you become the youngest Zero G mechanic in fifty years.
[ he says it so easily, like he's said it before, over and over, like some line that's meant to make her roll her eyes and hit him with a book. he doesn't believe she wouldn't study, riding on the coattails of any parent or friend or advisor. raven's always been hard at work, trying to better whatever she makes. if it hadn't been for her and the radios, her and her reading of books he'd never touch, he thinks he'd be dead in mount weather. ]
[ for all intents and purposes, though, he insists on teasing her. his hands don't stop on her foot. he isn't sure when he should stop, either, but he doesn't think on it. ]
Fifty-two. [Just saying, fifty-two isn't fifty, but who's counting? She looks down at her foot in his hands, and feels that same heat curl in her stomach again, so her toes curl and then wiggle, a soft sound escaping her when he smooths a knot out successfully.]
I have books. [She brings one hand down to wave it towards the desk, where some books lay in a pile and is that one on mythology? Maybe.]
[ bellamy smiles at her correction, assuming her to be proud of her achievement. she should be. it's not like she even brags about it when she can. he remembers it had been him telling her she was a genius, him telling her she still had work to do. she's never once really bragged about being the youngest zero g in fifty-two years. ]
[ his gaze focuses on her foot before he looks to the table, searching for the books among the clutter. once he spies what he thinks to be the spine of one, he smiles. ]
[ returning his attention to her foot, he bows his head to watch his hands. he hesitates in even acknowledging it, but after a few moments, asks quietly, ] Is it helping at all?
It's not those words exactly, but she's thrown for a loop when he asks, and her mind goes back to right then, of all moments. To his mouth on hers, and his mouth on her neck and his hands up along her back. If she hadn't been so raw and mad and angry at her own heart, she would've liked that.
She looks at his profile for a while, then has to look down, and away, gaze lowered.] Yeah, it's helping.
[ truthfully, bellamy doesn't think much of it when he first asks. it's just an innocent inquiry, one that would see him release her foot if it's not doing anything. maybe it isn't. when he'd tried to help his mother out when she'd been pregnant, it usually helped just a little. in hindsight, though, he thinks him just being there was what had her relax as much as she could. ]
[ just as they always are, though, he misses her looking at him as his attention is on her foot. she misses him glancing up at her after her response because she looks away. he trails after her, kind of like how he's always shadowing her these days, with his own thoughts returning to when he'd remained in his bed, wondering what the hell he hadn't been able to do for her. he figured it was because he wasn't finn, or maybe because he wasn't clarke's, but as vindictive as some of the guys hoped raven to be, bellamy just thinks she was looking for something and found the person she suspected may have it was just a disappointment whose hands were empty. ]
[ he's the guy who doesn't care, because admitting as much usually gets people floated or locked up. ]
[ it's after a noticeable pause, ] Good. [ he doesn't stop his hands, though. he hadn't asked to gauge whether or not her foot was fixed. it never will be. ]
[ he looks down and speaks to her foot. ] You should probably see if there's someone in the city who can make sure you don't work yourself into a cramp when you're reading all your big books.
[It could be. There are doctors in this city, and magic, and maybe she could get someone to fix her leg, but now it feels like a part of her. And she doesn't know, she doesn't know if she wants to, or dares to, ask anyone for help.
Yeah. [ he smiles, but it's small. he looks up at her, even though he feels like there may be some tension lingering ... or something. ]
[ he feigns disappointment by shaking his head and shrugging his shoulders. ] The smell of feet just doesn't do it for me. [ but he contradicts this by continuing to knead her foot. ]
[ there's a landmine there, he thinks, but bellamy willingly steps on it. compared to how he's smelled over the last few weeks, a mix of either smoke, anger, defeat, and his own blood thanks to mount weather, he'd rather just return to that. gunpowder hadn't been such a bad smell, in hindsight. ]
Yeah. The stuff they sell at the mall doesn't have the same kick to it. Expensive as hell, too.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
action;
[ he's well-aware she's looking at her leg, maybe referring to the loss of her other one as being the price for trying to attain glory. raven may think herself to be a little character in the mythology of the ark people, but where clarke is often the one to challenge him, raven had steered him and given him a path to run along when he had needed it most. ]
[ there's glory to be found in being the little guy. it may not get someone a golden apple at the end of the day, but there's something. ]
Remind me to tell you the story of Psyche. Little fish in a sea of sharks, but I think she got the happiest story of them all.
action;
Okay? Tell me.
action;
[ he looks at her when she closes her eyes, then down at her leg when she opens them. ] I would, but ... [ he presses his lips together and shrugs, wanting to convey it's not really his fault he can't. he doesn't realise he lifts one of his hands to wrap his fingers gently around her ankle. ] I only tell stories in exchange for food.
[ free coffee and its delivery get him here with the exchange of company, but his stories don't come without their price. he's found she's paid for them in lasagne and tacos. ]
[ though he doesn't expect any food now, not when she's comfortable, it's a promise he doesn't want to acknowledge. there's only one coffee boy who's been to her place, after all. he figures he may as well make it worth it. ]
action;
She raises her eyebrows. (At him, and at herself liking the thing.)] So you have a price. Ah. [The next time he calls her a pain in the ass, she's going to throw a ditto at him.
She's not focusing on his hand around her ankle, she's not.] Too bad I don't have your currency on me.
action;
I'm not cheap. [ he frowns, but smiles as he says it, like he's amused by her or he's having fun cornering her a little. ] You did just tell me to do what I wanted. [ she doesn't need the reminder, but maybe she does. mom used to tell him he could be anything he wanted to be, but he'd always seen the limitations due to his station. what raven's said — it's not something he's just going to brush aside. ]
[ only a part of him is aware he's stopped tapping his fingers against her ankle. he becomes aware of what he's doing after a few moments, but he doesn't stop his fingers from pressing into it, as if digging for the bone so he can touch her marrow, too. he knows he's purposefully kneading it, but he thinks he has a good excuse. ]
[ this had been the leg they'd drilled into. he hadn't had the chance to check in on her before coming here. it's not really a good excuse at all, but bellamy's so tired of his people getting hurt and he has to pass them over to abby to take care of and maybe even lecture. ]
[ but he acts like he's not even aware of what he's doing, like he doesn't wonder if her ankle hurts from the strain of her own stubborn determination to not act like she's falling apart. to him, she's not. there may be no glory in a bum leg, but there's strength to be found. ] I can't make coffee, but I can tell stories.
action; THIS IS FINE
The kneading, though, it makes something lock in her chest and she thinks that feels better than any hug or kiss or fuck she's had since she's been here. Which is unfair, to a number of people.
Maybe she should invest in one of these every week. Someone to knead life back into her limbs, so they don't hurt. She stays on her feet so often because getting up after sitting down always happens with a flinch, but there's a price to so much stubbornness.]
I've heard. You might be able to make some money out of that if you wanted. [She shrugs.] They let me dismantle cars even though I haven't touched one before in my life, so you know -- get creative.
action; everything is fine
[ he assumes it is. anything raven puts her mind to usually benefits the wider community, just like bellamy's decisions benefit the individual. ]
[ — like moving his hand down to the arch of her foot, kneading along the way. it's purposeful now, his other hand joining to dig his thumb into the arch of her foot. ]
[ he figures she's too stubborn and stupid to think about the fact she's placing so much weight on the one leg. mom had both hers but the weight of octavia to carry once. he thinks maybe she's strained herself like aurora had, too proud to ask for help, too much of a lone wolf to want to bother anyone. ]
[ he continues to act like he's not aware of what he's doing, even when his gaze slips to her foot as he shifts it so her heel digs into his thigh. looking up at her with a crease to his brows, it's clear he doesn't think his storytelling can be much use. ] They've got all these bookstores to go along with the twenty coffee shops they've got built next to one another. I doubt I could seriously make money off that.
action; everything's on fire and you burned us
Isn't this familiar.
She actually shudders when he kneads the arch of her foot, not putting it in words that it felt good.
She frowns, and focuses on his words instead; what, like stories can't be useful? Maybe if psychoes like Murphy had grown up with more stories, they wouldn't turn up the way they did. Raven, she fixes things and finds solutions; he only had to plant the seed in her head and she came up with walkie talkies. He's planted the seed, she comes up with,]
So do that. Fuck- [That knot of tension, fuck. She squeezes her eyes shut and shakes her head and then focuses again. With an exhale through her nose, she looks at him again.] People come here from times more ancient than the twenty first century, some of them probably don't even know how to handle books. I've seen so many repetitive network posts asking for a story. Tell stories.
action; gotta let it burn
[ he doesn't feel like saying anything about her reaction, even though it just tells him what he suspected: idiot. his hands continue to knead at her foot, wondering just how knotted she's allowed her good leg to become. he doubts it'll help her walk any easier, but it's something. ]
[ he can't just sit around and do nothing. ]
Tell stories. [ he repeats it, sounding incredulous. nothing is that simple. not in their world — but he's been reminded again and again, by the people here, by the things here, by how even those from home react to here, that this isn't their home at all. he shakes his head, looking down at her ankle. ] Alright. It sounds too damn easy, but — [ it's something. something he can be useful in, as he feels himself being useless, with no place at all, in eudio. ]
[ he chooses to joke, instead of confessing that. ] It's kind of sad people don't know how to hold a book. It's easier than a rifle.
action;
She lets out a pained little garbled laugh, because of where he just touched, and lets her head drop back against the arm rest.]
Or a sword. A lot lighter, too.
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[ he lets his eyes drift to her foot before looking up at her, noting how she rests her head against the arm rest. he sits comfortably, back against the cushions, no longer slouching so relaxedly he may slip off. ]
Guess what matters is we know how to hold a book. [ he tries not to smile as he quips, ] I don't know if you can read one, though.
action;
Not like she likes it.]
action;
[ looking at her pointedly, he rolls his eyes before he returns to his self-imposed task. he doesn't know if this will help her at the end of the day, but a brace can only do so much to alleviate the tension. he speaks to her matter-of-factly, ] That still doesn't prove you know how to.
action;
Gimme your stupid book, I'm going to read you a story and then hit you with it.
action;
[ besides, he doesn't wish to move. he's comfortable, sitting on her couch, doing something for her that neither of them really acknowledge within the moment. maybe it doesn't need to be, at least not within this minute where he has her completely distracted. he doesn't stop touching her, though, fingers moving down the length of her foot as slowly as a snail. ] You'd read the title and throw it at me. [ and he tsks in a reprimand of her predictability. ] Any excuse to hit me.
action;
Yes, because you're begging for it right now. [She crosses her arms under her head, convinced she's thinking the right thing.] I've studied from books thicker than that one.
action;
[ he says it so easily, like he's said it before, over and over, like some line that's meant to make her roll her eyes and hit him with a book. he doesn't believe she wouldn't study, riding on the coattails of any parent or friend or advisor. raven's always been hard at work, trying to better whatever she makes. if it hadn't been for her and the radios, her and her reading of books he'd never touch, he thinks he'd be dead in mount weather. ]
[ for all intents and purposes, though, he insists on teasing her. his hands don't stop on her foot. he isn't sure when he should stop, either, but he doesn't think on it. ]
Still doesn't prove to me you know how to read.
action;
I have books. [She brings one hand down to wave it towards the desk, where some books lay in a pile and is that one on mythology? Maybe.]
action;
[ his gaze focuses on her foot before he looks to the table, searching for the books among the clutter. once he spies what he thinks to be the spine of one, he smiles. ]
[ returning his attention to her foot, he bows his head to watch his hands. he hesitates in even acknowledging it, but after a few moments, asks quietly, ] Is it helping at all?
action;
It's not those words exactly, but she's thrown for a loop when he asks, and her mind goes back to right then, of all moments. To his mouth on hers, and his mouth on her neck and his hands up along her back. If she hadn't been so raw and mad and angry at her own heart, she would've liked that.
She looks at his profile for a while, then has to look down, and away, gaze lowered.] Yeah, it's helping.
action;
[ just as they always are, though, he misses her looking at him as his attention is on her foot. she misses him glancing up at her after her response because she looks away. he trails after her, kind of like how he's always shadowing her these days, with his own thoughts returning to when he'd remained in his bed, wondering what the hell he hadn't been able to do for her. he figured it was because he wasn't finn, or maybe because he wasn't clarke's, but as vindictive as some of the guys hoped raven to be, bellamy just thinks she was looking for something and found the person she suspected may have it was just a disappointment whose hands were empty. ]
[ he's the guy who doesn't care, because admitting as much usually gets people floated or locked up. ]
[ it's after a noticeable pause, ] Good. [ he doesn't stop his hands, though. he hadn't asked to gauge whether or not her foot was fixed. it never will be. ]
[ he looks down and speaks to her foot. ] You should probably see if there's someone in the city who can make sure you don't work yourself into a cramp when you're reading all your big books.
action;
Proof being, all this mess.]
What, you're quitting already? Do they smell?
action;
[ he feigns disappointment by shaking his head and shrugging his shoulders. ] The smell of feet just doesn't do it for me. [ but he contradicts this by continuing to knead her foot. ]
action;
Just gunpowder, huh?
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Yeah. The stuff they sell at the mall doesn't have the same kick to it. Expensive as hell, too.
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