[It's easier to make light of situation with a joke, around him. She's noticed this, like she's noticed that she can slip into that role, without a lot of a hitch. He rolls his eyes, she rolls hers.]
No, I'm correctly taking you for someone who hasn't done it a lot.
You hold my hand and suddenly you know everything about me? [ as defensive as the statement should be, he sounds amused, his eyebrow arched as he looks at her. the squeeze of his fingers means nothing, only emphasising the fact that through the holding of hands, she's to gain nothing but the feel of the callouses on his fingers. ]
[ truthfully, she's right. bellamy hasn't cuddled anyone, refusing to let too many get close. even though he'd indulged himself while on the ground, having fun with a few of the girls, he doesn't think it'd fulfil the quota of physical intimacy eudio upholds. cuddling means something serious, and bellamy blake doesn't really cuddle. ]
[She thinks to tell him yes, she knows enough about him to count. What Octavia means to him, what motivates him, what he looks like when he comes, what he kisses like, how much truth is in his words when he says he doesn't care, what kind of a leader he is, which are some of his favourite stories, what he'd name his pets if he had them.
But instead, she shrugs one shoulder, leans the elbow of the hand he's holding in his against her knee, and leans towards him a little, just to hold his gaze.] Why not? You know almost everything about me, and you just rubbed my foot.
I know almost everything about you. [ he repeats it, like it's something he's meant to believe in but clearly doesn't. if he's to rattle his mind about the things he knows of her, he'd find he may know a little more than what he thinks or even delves deep to locate. finn had meant more to her than anyone could comprehend; she'd been an adventurer even while on the ark, perhaps wanting to be a zero g so desperately but not as desperately as she wished for the stars that she risked her future for a walk in space; she thinks running away from people spares them; she has enough tolerance to deal with him. he doesn't want to acknowledge or even think about how his words are always the ones that seem to impact her most. he doubts she'd focused on the fact that he'd said she saved him when she'd been prying into mount weather. ]
[ still, he looks at her skeptically. ] So what if I rubbed your foot? What I know about you is that you think it means something. Your foot was there. I touched it.
[She smells a lot of bullshit and backtracking, which is familiar because she does this part a lot too. And here she goes,] Guess you did. [Then, she tilts her head and squints at him thoughtfully.]
[ the answer is of course. bellamy blake can't exist without octavia blake, and even though he's come to understand she doesn't need him anymore, it doesn't mean he doesn't need her. your sister, your responsibility has been drilled into his head over and over. bellamy would've told the eudio representatives where to shove it if it wasn't for octavia. ]
[ the answer is obvious to anyone who has ever seen bellamy interact with his sister. ]
[ he pauses for a moment and frowns. ] Why wouldn't I?
[She's just making a point here; making a point is more important to her right now than acknowledging the fact that she's basically giving him reasons to want to cuddle her. Something which she, usually, doesn't do.
But being right is more important here.]
So if there's a chance, even a remote chance, that Eudio's promises aren't empty, you're going to try and fill your end of the bargain anyway. So do it with someone who you trust -- trust someone.
[ regardless of how desperately he's tried to push the ludicrous deal far, far away from him, bellamy has had every intention of fulfilling his end of the bargain and then some. he wants o protected. he wants her to be safer than she would ever be when with him. ]
[ he may have the motivation, but he doesn't have the trust or comfort to go along with it. ]
[ what she says is basic common sense, but bellamy almost enjoys making everything almost too difficult for himself, especially when he takes to dipping his feet into a creek of self-loathing. ]
[ he continues to look at her, almost appearing bemused, ] I really doubt you want to cuddle right now.
[ bellamy blake only trusts two people in this city completely right now, and one of them happens to be sitting beside him, her hand warm in his. ]
[ isn't that really the perfect time to cuddle? he remembers his mother would always hug him after a moment that had clutched at his heart and had scared him worse than the dark at times. but bellamy doesn't comment on it. if he does, he thinks she'd read something into it that isn't there. ]
[ he looks at her before he glances away, focusing on the opposite wall. ]
[ he breathes out, ] Maybe not today. [ he's feeling a little drained, and a part of him knows he'd be skittish if she even tried. ]
[She feels skittish, like she should try; it won't stop being awkward as hell until they get started, anyway. But also, because she's just as hesitant to try. If it were someone else -- she has no way of knowing, really, which way the wind would blow if it were someone else.]
[ it's weird to consider what they need to do here in order to survive doesn't involve aiming a rifle at another human being or trying to create a bomb. it doesn't even involve infiltration, where he'd been so afraid of not being able to contact those on the other side that when he'd heard raven's voice on the end each and every time, his hackles were soothed and he felt a little more grounded than he had the last. it's odd to think all they have to do is be a softer version of who they could be — or perhaps simply be who they are. ]
[ he knows it for what it is — it's not quite an agreement, but it's something else on her own offer of i owe you. except, it doesn't feel like it's out of obligation at all, given he'd stripped it of that the very moment she thought to offer herself to ensure he met his own reason for being here. ]
If you wanted to only hear about Cerberus and Hades ... [ he begins to unwrap his hand from hers. ] Maybe I should go.
[It's not all that correct. She's not that much of a bitch, and sometimes she feels lonely, but the point is - the point is, she didn't just call him over for stories. She doesn't know why she did, but...]
No, stay. [She leaves her hand limp, so he can pull away if he still wants to.]
[ he nods, almost to himself. he remains put, but his hand doesn't quite move from hers, even if his grip is no longer as hard or tight as before. it just sits in her hand, as if he's forgotten to pull it back. it's his own acceptance of her own offer; he supposes she doesn't want to be alone. ]
What does Raven Reyes even do when she's not making bullets? [ he looks at her, then. he finds himself changing from being uncertain and a fish out of water to still being a fish out of water but somewhat comfortable. ]
[She lets out a huff of laughter.] Fix cars, learns to ride them, works on shelters for animals, starts up projects nobody asked for, practices archery and playing drums.
[You know, not much. She shrugs.] Occasionally, lie on this couch and watch Netflix.
[ all of that is crap he doesn't find any difficulty in believing or imagining raven liking. she's always been into the little projects to keep herself busy. it's kind of a relief to see that what he'd observed of her at camp is something that hadn't been born from their own wars. ]
[ he repeats, muttering, ] Netflix.
[ he remembers elsa had messaged him about netflix, amongst an assortment of crap he didn't really recognise or even know. he hadn't thought to ask her what that was at the time, but now that it's brought up again ... bellamy looks to raven with a frown. ] What the hell is that?
Ha. [She thinks he's in for a treat, given than the last time they were treated to a video of any sort it had been about Unity Day and nobody bought that bullshit anymore anyway.]
Let me show you. [She has to get up first, just to go and get the remote from the table, and though it means letting go she still does it.
She turns the TV on, and brings up her very own Netflix account. (There are a lot of Fast & Furious movies on queue you betcha.)]
[ when she lets go and leaves, he sinks into the couch, his hands in his lap as he watches her. he thinks nothing of it, even though he flexes his fingers and does nothing more. there's nothing else for him to do but wait, and so he does. but he isn't so sure of the options, if there's stuff on this netflix that are like the unity day video they'd watched over and over, or like the football games he'd been able to watch once or twice because mom befriended the right type of guard. ]
[ he shrugs his shoulders, a little overwhelmed by the options. there's a lot of titles he doesn't recognise, and so, he finds himself not interested in watching a movie he doesn't even know. if all of them was a rational response, it's what would be slipping from his mouth instead of: ] Uh. Your favourite, I guess.
[ the "be quiet" rule is one bellamy doesn't quite know, at least not yet. it takes him a while to get that this is going to be a film about two guys racing cars, a cop doing some infiltrating, and bellamy predicts he's going to get the gorgeous girl falling in love with him. isn't that how all the greek myths go? without the cars and the bullets, it's almost like watching one of those come to life. ]
[ he can't help it, though. he cocks an eyebrow before he looks at her, his hands still awkwardly in his lap. ]
... You seriously like a movie about people racing cars?
[ he shakes his head and looks back at the television. ] I don't know why I'm surprised.
[ bellamy rolls his eyes. he looks at the television but ends up resting his head on the top of the couch to gaze at her in amusement instead. ] You just like it for the ego boost, huh?
O would like it for ... [ he turns his head and waits until paul walker appears in screen again before he lifts his arm to gesture toward him. ] Him.
[ bellamy opens his mouth, looking at the television, then decides he's changing his stance entirely once he looks at her. he lifts his arm and stretches it along the top of the couch behind her, an absent choice of his own as he doesn't rest his head on the cushions. ] How about we don't tell O about this at all? She doesn't need anymore bad ideas.
[ as responsible and mature that she is, octavia may want to try it. if car stunts are anything like this movie, but with a touch of realism, he wants his little sister far, far away from what could kill her. it's funny, given where they've lived for the last few months, but he can't save her from what he can barely understand. ]
[ he doesn't think about his arm being pressed flat against the top of the cushions behind her, either. ]
[She laughs to herself,] Predictable. [And continues to watch the movie. In her opinion, it doesn't matter what she doesn't tell Octavia, she'll do whatever she feels like if she wants to explore. And Raven would rather just tell her what stuff you can't do with a car, than all the things you can't.
But that's just her.
The movie's plot is predictable, and cheesy, and she still gets into it. Enough that she doesn't have problems putting the draining argument behind her, enough that gradually -- the couch is small alright, and they're gonna anyway -- leans closer towards him.]
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No, I'm correctly taking you for someone who hasn't done it a lot.
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[ truthfully, she's right. bellamy hasn't cuddled anyone, refusing to let too many get close. even though he'd indulged himself while on the ground, having fun with a few of the girls, he doesn't think it'd fulfil the quota of physical intimacy eudio upholds. cuddling means something serious, and bellamy blake doesn't really cuddle. ]
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But instead, she shrugs one shoulder, leans the elbow of the hand he's holding in his against her knee, and leans towards him a little, just to hold his gaze.] Why not? You know almost everything about me, and you just rubbed my foot.
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[ still, he looks at her skeptically. ] So what if I rubbed your foot? What I know about you is that you think it means something. Your foot was there. I touched it.
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You asked for something for Octavia, didn't you?
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[ the answer is obvious to anyone who has ever seen bellamy interact with his sister. ]
[ he pauses for a moment and frowns. ] Why wouldn't I?
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But being right is more important here.]
So if there's a chance, even a remote chance, that Eudio's promises aren't empty, you're going to try and fill your end of the bargain anyway. So do it with someone who you trust -- trust someone.
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[ he may have the motivation, but he doesn't have the trust or comfort to go along with it. ]
[ what she says is basic common sense, but bellamy almost enjoys making everything almost too difficult for himself, especially when he takes to dipping his feet into a creek of self-loathing. ]
[ he continues to look at her, almost appearing bemused, ] I really doubt you want to cuddle right now.
[ bellamy blake only trusts two people in this city completely right now, and one of them happens to be sitting beside him, her hand warm in his. ]
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You mean after all these light-hearted conversations? [She shrugs.] No. But -- I don't have a schedule for when I'll want to ready for you.
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[ he looks at her before he glances away, focusing on the opposite wall. ]
[ he breathes out, ] Maybe not today. [ he's feeling a little drained, and a part of him knows he'd be skittish if she even tried. ]
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Yeah, maybe not.
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[ he knows it for what it is — it's not quite an agreement, but it's something else on her own offer of i owe you. except, it doesn't feel like it's out of obligation at all, given he'd stripped it of that the very moment she thought to offer herself to ensure he met his own reason for being here. ]
If you wanted to only hear about Cerberus and Hades ... [ he begins to unwrap his hand from hers. ] Maybe I should go.
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No, stay. [She leaves her hand limp, so he can pull away if he still wants to.]
You could - you can hang out, if you want.
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What does Raven Reyes even do when she's not making bullets? [ he looks at her, then. he finds himself changing from being uncertain and a fish out of water to still being a fish out of water but somewhat comfortable. ]
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[You know, not much. She shrugs.] Occasionally, lie on this couch and watch Netflix.
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[ he repeats, muttering, ] Netflix.
[ he remembers elsa had messaged him about netflix, amongst an assortment of crap he didn't really recognise or even know. he hadn't thought to ask her what that was at the time, but now that it's brought up again ... bellamy looks to raven with a frown. ] What the hell is that?
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Let me show you. [She has to get up first, just to go and get the remote from the table, and though it means letting go she still does it.
She turns the TV on, and brings up her very own Netflix account. (There are a lot of Fast & Furious movies on queue you betcha.)]
What do you wanna watch?
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[ he shrugs his shoulders, a little overwhelmed by the options. there's a lot of titles he doesn't recognise, and so, he finds himself not interested in watching a movie he doesn't even know. if all of them was a rational response, it's what would be slipping from his mouth instead of: ] Uh. Your favourite, I guess.
[ her taste hasn't let him down yet. ]
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Sometimes people end up cuddling during movies, but she's not sure. This one isn't exactly The Notebook, is it?]
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[ he can't help it, though. he cocks an eyebrow before he looks at her, his hands still awkwardly in his lap. ]
... You seriously like a movie about people racing cars?
[ he shakes his head and looks back at the television. ] I don't know why I'm surprised.
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They're fast and furious. I'm fast and furious. Of course I like it.
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O would like it for ... [ he turns his head and waits until paul walker appears in screen again before he lifts his arm to gesture toward him. ] Him.
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Wouldn't that be almost acceptable to her liking it for the idea of car stunts?
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[ as responsible and mature that she is, octavia may want to try it. if car stunts are anything like this movie, but with a touch of realism, he wants his little sister far, far away from what could kill her. it's funny, given where they've lived for the last few months, but he can't save her from what he can barely understand. ]
[ he doesn't think about his arm being pressed flat against the top of the cushions behind her, either. ]
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But that's just her.
The movie's plot is predictable, and cheesy, and she still gets into it. Enough that she doesn't have problems putting the draining argument behind her, enough that gradually -- the couch is small alright, and they're gonna anyway -- leans closer towards him.]
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